The "Accident"

Sunday, October 23, 2005 | 0 Comments

I called my parents to tell them about my new job. It had actually been awhile since I had talked to them. After talking to my dad for awhile he was going to give the phone over to my mom. Before he does, he says, "Whatever you do, don't ask her about Appleton."

As I am talking to my mom she starts to relay the story behind my dad's apparent shame:
They had taken a trip to Milwaukee for one of my dad's doctor's appointments. On the way back, they stopped in Appleton to get gas. Mom hadn't been feeling well, so she was sleeping under a blanket in the front seat while Dad pumped the gas and went in to pay. He drove the rest of the way home without stopping- two and half hours from Appleton. He pulled up and went into the house. He was in there for about a half hour when he realized that Mom had not followed him in. He looked out. She hadn't even opened her car door! Geez! He thought. He'd better go wake her up. He pulled the blanket back to find that she wasn't there. He had left her in Appleton!

While my dad was pumping the gas, my mom had woke up and went in to go to the bathroom. When my mom came out of the gas station, she couldn't find my dad or the car anywhere. She figured that he would be back shortly, so she waited...for almost two hours!

She finally decided that she could not wait any longer for him. Luckily my brother lived nearby, so she went there and fell asleep on their couch. (note here: I was not aware that my parents were even talking to him again! They have been on the outs for several years since a fist fight between my dad and my brother at a campground... but that is a story for another time!)

My dad immediately called my brother, "Is my wife there?"

I can imagine the embarrassment that my dad had to be going through! He had to call his son, a son that he has had a strained relationship with, to find out if his abandoned wife- our mother- had found her way to his house! Hilarious!

Of course, you know, he will never be allowed to live this down! ;)


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Blogger sideshow bob said...

You don't have to worry about that with me...if you're quiet for that long I'll know something's wrong!

Plus I can't piss you off now that you're my sugar-momma...

October 23, 2005 8:44 PM

Blogger evilsciencechick said...


oh, your poor dad! at least your brother lived nearby! your mom would have been SERIOUSLY PISSED if she had to spend 6 hours at a gas station, I think!

October 23, 2005 8:49 PM

Blogger Shannon said...

Your dad obviously hadn't heard of the Lake Winnebego triangle which exists between Neenah, Menasha, and Appleton. Apparently, according to my grandpa, wives disappear there all the time.

October 24, 2005 12:21 AM

Blogger DrMax said...

Hey, congrats on the job! Glad to hear it worked out for you!

Slowly coming back online. Great story about your Dad. I would like to say that could never happen to me, but the longer you're married the more you assume.

October 24, 2005 3:09 AM

Blogger OldRoses said...

Your mother sounds like a saint!

October 24, 2005 4:54 AM

Blogger nope said...

Wow, an urban legend come to life! I'm glad it all worked out OK!

October 24, 2005 9:59 AM

Blogger Sandy said...

Too funny. I would have killed him.

October 24, 2005 10:41 AM

Blogger Sylvana said...

SSB, maybe that is why I talk so much, I don't want to get left behind!

ESC, my dad would love to hear you say "your poor dad". It's all about him!

Shannon, I think I have heard that too, but I thought it was because of all the bars, strip clubs, and porn shops.

Dr. Max, thanks. I'm pretty excited about my job.
My dad is impatient and in his rush to get something done, he often makes pretty big mistakes.

OldRoses, my mother is far from sainthood. But she can be pretty patient, especially with my dad.

Indiaiynke, urban legend! That is what I was thinking when I heard this story! But this kind of stuff seems to happen to my family a lot.

Sandy, me too!

October 24, 2005 12:18 PM

Blogger Maria said...

Holy crap, what a story! Congrats on your job! That's awesome.

October 24, 2005 12:57 PM

Blogger Derek Knight said...


October 24, 2005 1:46 PM

Blogger sands of time said...

Oh Poor dad.I cant believe he never noticed until he got home she wasnt there.Its very funny though.He'll never live it down.

October 24, 2005 2:59 PM

Blogger SierraBella said...

Oh please tell me your mom was fully dressed, unlike the urban legend!

Great story.

October 24, 2005 3:56 PM

Blogger Astoria said...

Okay, this is why you shouldn't read these things at work! I laughed right out load. Then again I've met your parents which makes it even funnier!

October 24, 2005 3:57 PM

Blogger Indigo Red said...

This thing between your dad and brother is similar to what happened between my father and his father. In 1940, Dad(18 yrs) beat-up Granpa(42 yrs) and promptly headed down the road to who knew what. Dad got a job as a machinist making springs for British Spitfire airplanes. Shortly thereafter, WWII was on and Dad enlisted in the Navy. It wasn't until I was 50, that I learned why the two never got along.

I wonder how many sons and fathers part violently. Whatever the number, it's sad.

October 24, 2005 6:21 PM

Blogger Sylvana said...

Maria, thanks. I'm very happy at my new job. It worked out just right.

Derek, my family has lots of strange but true stories.

Pink Lady, my dad has a fairly good sense of humor so he will survive. But we are obliged to tease him about this!

Sierrabella, I'm pretty sure that she would not have left the car to use the bathroom if she wasn't dressed, but you know- I didn't ask!

Astoria, my family is pretty interesting, huh?

Indigo Red, I know why they aren't getting along. My dad has issues. He has been working on them, but he has done so much in the past it will take a lot before we will believe that he has actually changed. We love him dearly, but my brothers and sister have decided that they can't live a healthy life with him in it as he is right now. I, on the other hand, being the upfront, no-nonsense person that I am, have found a strange balance with him. Of course, I'm always aware that things could change! As long as he keeps the lines of communication open instead of getting so pissed that he refuses to talk to me, I think we will be just fine.

October 24, 2005 7:00 PM

Blogger cookie christine said...

geez. and i thought my family was crazy.

October 25, 2005 3:40 PM

Blogger Sylvana said...

Cookie Christine, I'm sure that your family is crazy. Crazy families produce interesting people.

October 26, 2005 7:08 PM

Blogger Randi said...

thats funny!!!

October 27, 2005 9:12 PM

Blogger Sylvana said...

Randi, even my mom was laughing about that one. As I always say, funny is funny!

October 29, 2005 11:26 AM

Blogger Wendy A said...

Great Story! Your poor dad must feel like he is going insane.

October 30, 2005 3:52 AM

Blogger Sylvana said...

No, Wendy A, I'm sure that he KNOWS that he is going insane.

October 30, 2005 1:59 PM

Blogger ORF said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! That story is hysterical!

November 01, 2005 4:06 PM